Gay Star Alignment Explains Rare Phenomenon

Republican House Party

(TBN) - House Republicans briefly transformed their image this past weekend when the entire political party turned into a frenzy of gay pride induced dancing, parading and glitter-bombing.

Initially confused, scientists were able to pinpoint the cause of the phenomenon as result of the rare homo star alignment of Ellen Degeneres and Sapphire - author of Precious - in Louisville Kentucky; both gay stars were there separately for various promotional reasons.

House Democrats initially thought the Republicans were acting out due to stress caused by the ongoing Debt Ceiling debacle, but they quickly realized something more was at hand when the ghost of Judy Garland materialized, to the delight of both Republicans and Democrats. 

"The last time I saw a group of people break into spontaneous dance like this was that time I had dinner at that haunted house," Nancy Pelosi stated. Nancy retracted that statement a few moments later, claiming she was actually thinking of Beetlejuice.

Dancing In The Streets

Though this alignment of gay stars is rare, the event has occurred at least one other time in the last 30 years. 

Some readers may recall the time when David Bowie and Mick Jagger released their version of Dancing In The Streets, which had the far reaching consequences of converting both Ted Haggard and Mary Cheney (Dick Cheney's daughter) to homosexuality. Since that time, both Ted and Mary have dealt with their gayness in different manners - Ted having gone the more traditional way of suppressing his moist impulses until reaching office. 

Mick and Dave said they were unaware that their proximity could cause such an occurrence, and have not worked with one another out of maintaining the natural order of things. 

Democrats who witnessed the Republican homo-explosion have been offered counseling to deal with the festive events of last Saturday.